My great friend Tony just put this great post on his blog. It is a must read! My feelings match his. I don't think I need to say more, except that he rocks!
Took the day off from the gig today to get packed and organized for the weekend at the Burn 24 hour. Did a little work in the morning and evening, but pretty much took a leisurely pace at getting everything ready.
Made meals, last minute bike tuning, laying out my clothing, tools, parts, etc.
I have have received a bunch of emails this past week concerning my comments on my personal racing philosophy I mentioned in my May 14th post. Quite a few seemed to suggest, just as the person I was talking to on the 14th, that I didn't sound competitive enough, or able to race with the "big boys" and the elites.
I find those statements laughable and, truthfully, a little annoying. I don't believe that you have the right to question my drive or commitment. You can ask ANYONE who personally knows me or trains with me (Marcy, or POS) and they will tell you that I am a extremely competitive person who cannot stand to lose or fail. I have been accused of being competitive to a fault. I ride, train, and race as hard as I can to be as fast as I can be.
That being said, over the years I have learned to appreciate the finer aspects of racing more than flat out winning. There is certainly SO MUCH more to consider a "victory" that just taking 1st place.
Leaving the diabetes aspect aside, to me the definition of endurance racing is simply overcoming all forms of mental and physical challenges, and continuing on regardless of the obstacle faced. The events I tend to partake in will push a rider to (and past) their own personal limitations, and I thoroughly enjoy that type of test. When passed, it has a sweet reward like NO OTHER I have ever experienced in any other aspect of my life. When failed, it leaves a biting bitterness in my consciousness that haunts me for long time. Sometimes all the way until the next time I am participating in an event that will test me again.
Add the fact that I am indeed a Type 1 diabetic back in to the equation, and I can find many more "victories" as these races. I am forced to basically monitor the energy consumption and muscular fueling process manually. Just being able to say that I did that at an effective enough level that I was able to complete the event is HUGE to me. That is probably my highest level goal at all events. Everything else is just gravy. Finishing 1st or 51st overall is, honestly, of secondary value.
Does this mean I don't strive to win. Hell no! It just makes my greatest and primary competitor (combatant) at any event diabetes itself. In some ways I actually feel that this leads to MORE pressure and drive succeed. Knowing that diabetes can beat me sometimes (like what occurred at Cohutta this year) is just unbearable. I cannot let the disease think, even for just an instant, that it may have the upper hand. Ever.! I need to keep the throttle down, and need to continue t drive my cleated cycling shoe into its throat.
When diabetes sometimes wins and gains a tiny fingernail hold, a little bit of fear and doubt does start to creep in to my head. Diabetes is a tremendously complicated disease. An unbelievably complicated disease that effects so many aspects of your life and body. Can it even be controlled at such a level?
What if the nay sayers and doubters are right with their statements and predictions? "Type 1 diabetics cannot compete in 24 hour solo events"! "You cannot have successful control of your blood glucose levels under race conditions for that long"! "You will have a catastrophic low and fall in a coma! You will have a catastrophic high, and do permanent damage to your liver, your eyes, your heart"!
I have spent literally thousands of hours in the saddle developing techniques that allow me to effectively race as a "non-diabetic". Learning to use and adapt amazing technologies, tools like the Deltec Cozmo Insulin Pump, I am the only Type 1 I have ever heard of racing these distances and endurance events solo.
24 hour solo mountain bike races and the like are perfect little microcosms of living with diabetes: Learn and train as much as you can. Have a plan for maintaining steady forward progress, but, yet, be ready to deviate from that plan if necessary. Be flexible for an ever changing course in ever changing conditions.
Its exactly what life is like as a Type 1 or Type 2.
To those who emailed to say I "don't sound competitive enough" I say your are completely wrong and misguided. I compete to break the limitations and stereotypes of a deadly disease each and every single time I push down on a pedal whether inside on a spin bike, or during a rain storm during hour 21 at an all day mountain bike race. I compete against myself at least 10 times a day with every blood sugar check, and measure my results one A1C number at a time. A very large percentage of the time, I am completely victorious.
I CAN"T WAIT until noon tomorrow, and the start of the 24 Hours of Burn!!
Just one more......
Friday, May 30, 2008
Sleeping In Feels So Good
Ooooh, and it does! I'm a morning person, so sleeping in for me is 6:30-7, and this week I've had a chance to do a lot of it. I've had a rather slow week at work so that let's my training come in during later morning hours. I have been really liking getting up to eat breakfast, then 2 hours later I can get a good workout in. There is something to be said about fueling up before a long run! I usually just throw myself out the door in the morning, and maybe eat a Balance Bar. This is new for me, and I like it. My run yesterday was great! I mean awesome great!
The sun was out, it was 65ish degrees, NO tights....but shorts and a t-shirt on! This was already setting up to be a wonderful run. My blood sugar was 160ish after 10gms., I had my Ipod on, and my water bottle holder that carries Powergels, Skiddles, and...as always, my meter.....I walk out and start the planned 1:20min. run.
I have a few markers on my route that are my bg check stops. The BIG tree is one, and I stretch there too. It is at about 2.5 miles. Blood sugar is staying even at 165, but I knew I had some insulin on board still and that worried me a bit, so I took in half of a gel. Legs felt good...no aches or pains...OR tight calves, which seems to be a consistent problem for me when I increase my mileage.
Next stop...top of BIG hill. Yeah, an excuse right? But it really is a legitimate stop! I realize I have a problem now...that gel I only ate half of is now all over my hands, which means if I test with all that sugar on them it will give me a VERY high, and very inaccurate number. So I'm now on the search for a sprinkler on someones lawn. How's that for creative thinking? Thank goodness I found one on the next block and another check has me at 142. Glad I ate that gel...which helps more then just the blood sugar, but keeps you from bonking. If I'm going for 1:20min., and it's going this well, there is no way I want to bonk!
I'm trying not to be too surprised at how I am feeling, and focus on enjoying the moment. I have about 20 min. left to go and I changed up the music and went for it. I got home and my final time was 1:15:36. Now normally I would go back out to get the last 5 min. in....we all know I'm anal like that... but I had a feeling my mileage was around 8, and didn't want to increase that until next week. (Very slow increases in mileage=NO injuries) Blood sugar ended in the same range as when I started. Who could ask for anything more?! Thanks to MapMyRun, it was 8 miles. Good guess on my part.
Just one question....Now what happens when I go back to a regular work load and can't sleep in?
The sun was out, it was 65ish degrees, NO tights....but shorts and a t-shirt on! This was already setting up to be a wonderful run. My blood sugar was 160ish after 10gms., I had my Ipod on, and my water bottle holder that carries Powergels, Skiddles, and...as always, my meter.....I walk out and start the planned 1:20min. run.
I have a few markers on my route that are my bg check stops. The BIG tree is one, and I stretch there too. It is at about 2.5 miles. Blood sugar is staying even at 165, but I knew I had some insulin on board still and that worried me a bit, so I took in half of a gel. Legs felt good...no aches or pains...OR tight calves, which seems to be a consistent problem for me when I increase my mileage.
Next stop...top of BIG hill. Yeah, an excuse right? But it really is a legitimate stop! I realize I have a problem now...that gel I only ate half of is now all over my hands, which means if I test with all that sugar on them it will give me a VERY high, and very inaccurate number. So I'm now on the search for a sprinkler on someones lawn. How's that for creative thinking? Thank goodness I found one on the next block and another check has me at 142. Glad I ate that gel...which helps more then just the blood sugar, but keeps you from bonking. If I'm going for 1:20min., and it's going this well, there is no way I want to bonk!
I'm trying not to be too surprised at how I am feeling, and focus on enjoying the moment. I have about 20 min. left to go and I changed up the music and went for it. I got home and my final time was 1:15:36. Now normally I would go back out to get the last 5 min. in....we all know I'm anal like that... but I had a feeling my mileage was around 8, and didn't want to increase that until next week. (Very slow increases in mileage=NO injuries) Blood sugar ended in the same range as when I started. Who could ask for anything more?! Thanks to MapMyRun, it was 8 miles. Good guess on my part.
Just one question....Now what happens when I go back to a regular work load and can't sleep in?
Monday, May 26, 2008
Weekend Continued
Ride, walk, eat, walk, grocery store, run 4.5 miles....now what?? Geezzz, where do I find the time?
So I met up with Steve again for a nice recovery ride. I stress recovery here. After 40 miles yesterday, the 20 we did today was welcome. (Can you say "oh my ass" again?) I tried to focus on slow easy climbs, and luckily the area we were riding didn't have many. We finished up early, and Steve decided to go for a short run. I, on the other hand, wanted to run longer this afternoon after breakfast and a rest. Brent and I decided to walk up to breakfast to find that the restaurant was closed. Then walked a block to another one...which was open...thank you. I fueled up and didn't bolus for all of it because of the run I wanted to go on.
I got home and got in the car to Whole Foods. By the way...I HATE grocery shopping. But the alternative is Brent not cooking for me if I don't .....so of course I go.
Home again, and suit up for the long run. Yes, my full intention was to go long...in the 7 mile range. But it got hot here in Michigan! I mean hot and humid! This bod isn't use to that, and the run was a struggle. I even had water with electrolytes in it, but it still was pretty painful. I wasn't so salty at the end of the 4.5 miles, so the water mix must have worked, but it did nothing for the energy.
Ok, it was a long weekend filled with activity, and I could be just tired and haven't recovered enough from all of it....this I know. I guess I'll do a real recovery tomorrow...the pool!
So I met up with Steve again for a nice recovery ride. I stress recovery here. After 40 miles yesterday, the 20 we did today was welcome. (Can you say "oh my ass" again?) I tried to focus on slow easy climbs, and luckily the area we were riding didn't have many. We finished up early, and Steve decided to go for a short run. I, on the other hand, wanted to run longer this afternoon after breakfast and a rest. Brent and I decided to walk up to breakfast to find that the restaurant was closed. Then walked a block to another one...which was open...thank you. I fueled up and didn't bolus for all of it because of the run I wanted to go on.
I got home and got in the car to Whole Foods. By the way...I HATE grocery shopping. But the alternative is Brent not cooking for me if I don't .....so of course I go.
Home again, and suit up for the long run. Yes, my full intention was to go long...in the 7 mile range. But it got hot here in Michigan! I mean hot and humid! This bod isn't use to that, and the run was a struggle. I even had water with electrolytes in it, but it still was pretty painful. I wasn't so salty at the end of the 4.5 miles, so the water mix must have worked, but it did nothing for the energy.
Ok, it was a long weekend filled with activity, and I could be just tired and haven't recovered enough from all of it....this I know. I guess I'll do a real recovery tomorrow...the pool!
Sunday, May 25, 2008
Riding Kind Of Weekend
Yes, yes, yes....let the rides continue! An absolutely gorgeous day, and an absolutely gorgeous ride this morning! I met a bunch of my riding friends at my old stompin grounds. It was a 40 min. drive to get there, but WELL worth the trip. The only awful thing about the morning was the blood sugar of 250 when I woke up. That was way unexpected, and not real sure how that happened...which I will continue to be pissed off about.
I loaded all the gear into the car and headed for Starbucks...I just need that coffee this morning, ok any morning really! I drank and ate my Zone bar on the car ride up. I bolused 2 units, which was half for the food and half for the correction. I, of course, didn't want to drop, and knew the ride would be starting soon, so this was my first bolus guess of the morning. I arrived early...first one there actually...right, a surprise to all of you I'm sure. I layered up a bit more because it freakin cold out! What??? It was suppose to be warmer then the high 30's. I put the leg warmers on, and 3 layers that I hope I can strip off during. (I never did) The 6 of us headed out for a hilly ride. The first 2 headed back after half an hour...they only had an hour to ride. The second 2 turned around after about 12-15 miles. Then there was Steve and I who hammered out 40 miles. Great ride! Nice to be next to Steve again. It was his first ride outside of the season, and he agreed to go for the 40. I figured he would. He paid me a very nice compliment, and said that I was riding stronger then last year. NICE!! That base training is paying off. I ride hard when I'm with him, mostly because I'm trying to keep up. But today....I WAS keeping up, and I wasn't trying so hard to do it. Don't get me wrong, it was still a tough ride, and a challenge, but not so anaerobic.
So the last major hill we hit is very near the end of our ride...and what happens next you ask? Blood sugar 73...and I didn't feel low and wouldn't necessarily at that point, but my legs were feeling a little weak. I really thought it was just miles I was feeling, but no! I downed a bag of Skittles in hopes of getting up that hill. Well...I did, and it wasn't pretty...but I did, with Steve at the top of it waiting to make sure I was ok, and did I need anything. Nothin better then a riding partner who looks out for you. Everyone should have a Steve!
Back to the car....then to Tim Hortons for fuel....home...shower....walk to lunch with Brent...walk home....20 min. nap (who is this girl? she doesn't nap!!)...off to swim with the nieces...and the day isn't complete yet. More to come!
I loaded all the gear into the car and headed for Starbucks...I just need that coffee this morning, ok any morning really! I drank and ate my Zone bar on the car ride up. I bolused 2 units, which was half for the food and half for the correction. I, of course, didn't want to drop, and knew the ride would be starting soon, so this was my first bolus guess of the morning. I arrived early...first one there actually...right, a surprise to all of you I'm sure. I layered up a bit more because it freakin cold out! What??? It was suppose to be warmer then the high 30's. I put the leg warmers on, and 3 layers that I hope I can strip off during. (I never did) The 6 of us headed out for a hilly ride. The first 2 headed back after half an hour...they only had an hour to ride. The second 2 turned around after about 12-15 miles. Then there was Steve and I who hammered out 40 miles. Great ride! Nice to be next to Steve again. It was his first ride outside of the season, and he agreed to go for the 40. I figured he would. He paid me a very nice compliment, and said that I was riding stronger then last year. NICE!! That base training is paying off. I ride hard when I'm with him, mostly because I'm trying to keep up. But today....I WAS keeping up, and I wasn't trying so hard to do it. Don't get me wrong, it was still a tough ride, and a challenge, but not so anaerobic.
So the last major hill we hit is very near the end of our ride...and what happens next you ask? Blood sugar 73...and I didn't feel low and wouldn't necessarily at that point, but my legs were feeling a little weak. I really thought it was just miles I was feeling, but no! I downed a bag of Skittles in hopes of getting up that hill. Well...I did, and it wasn't pretty...but I did, with Steve at the top of it waiting to make sure I was ok, and did I need anything. Nothin better then a riding partner who looks out for you. Everyone should have a Steve!
Back to the car....then to Tim Hortons for fuel....home...shower....walk to lunch with Brent...walk home....20 min. nap (who is this girl? she doesn't nap!!)...off to swim with the nieces...and the day isn't complete yet. More to come!
Saturday, May 17, 2008
I Got Tagged!
Thanks a ton Courtney! 10 random facts huh? I'll list the rules, because she did, and I don't want to mess this up...although I don't know if I know 6 people who blog....so here are the rules:
1. Maybe this isn't' a weird fact for people who know me well, but I'm a control freak. Not just a little one either, but a big one!!
2. I eat the same thing every morning...yes the same thing. Eggwhite omlette with fake meat, cheese and homemade toast ( the bread is homemade), yogurt(homemade) with blueberries and granola. (homemade) I'm big on homemade!
3. I HATE bananas! Absolutely hate them! If you want to torture me, just eat a banana, and make the gross noise in my ear as your chewing.
4. The first thing I do in the shower is wash my hair. Not very interesting I know, but the rules said weird right?
5. All the clothes I own are black, brown and blue jeans....oh wait I do have a red shirt, and a pair of black pants!
6. I sometimes have the honesty of a child. I'll tell you like it is most of the time. No mystery with me.
7. I love to go to the casino!! I have no money to do it, but I love to play the video slots. I really just like the bonus rounds, and I prefer the penny slots!
8. Work?!?! I'm ready to move on. And contrary to what people think, hairdressers aren't stupid!! At least this one thinks she isn't!
9. Love, love, love my husband. Ok, corny I know, but he's the bestest thing ever!
10. For fear of sounding really stupid.....here goes...I still sleep with my "blankie". Really it's an adult kind of blanket, but I put it over my face and eyes when I sleep. This can't be that weird, because I know someone who does the same. Maybe not with a blanket, but with a T-shirt....MARI! Did I just "out" someone?
11. Yes, I'm adding another. This is deep, watch out....I'm diabetic. And in so many ways kinda grateful because of it.
Now for the six people:
1. Tony...where for art thou Tony! Because he's fueled my passion, and an unbelievable mtn. biker and friend!
2. Mike...because he was the first to comment on my Tu Diabetes profile, and just sounds like a great guy!
3. Mari...because she's just the inspiration for all!! I know she doesn't have a traditional blog, but has a Tu Diabetes site.
I wish I could tag non-bloggers. I'd love that, but those aren't the rules, and those people above are who I know that blog. That means I have no 4,5, and 6...so anyone out there with a blog and is diabetic, follow the rules and let me know so I can read!
The Rules:
Once you’ve been tagged, you have to write a blog with 10 weird, random, facts, habits or goals about yourself. At the end, choose 6 people to be tagged, list their names & why you tagged them. Don’t forget to leave them a comment saying “You’re it!” & to go read your blog. You cannot tag the person that tagged you, so since you’re not allowed to tag me back; let me know when you are done so I can go read YOUR weird/random/odd facts, habits and goals.
Head first..here we go...1. Maybe this isn't' a weird fact for people who know me well, but I'm a control freak. Not just a little one either, but a big one!!
2. I eat the same thing every morning...yes the same thing. Eggwhite omlette with fake meat, cheese and homemade toast ( the bread is homemade), yogurt(homemade) with blueberries and granola. (homemade) I'm big on homemade!
3. I HATE bananas! Absolutely hate them! If you want to torture me, just eat a banana, and make the gross noise in my ear as your chewing.
4. The first thing I do in the shower is wash my hair. Not very interesting I know, but the rules said weird right?
5. All the clothes I own are black, brown and blue jeans....oh wait I do have a red shirt, and a pair of black pants!
6. I sometimes have the honesty of a child. I'll tell you like it is most of the time. No mystery with me.
7. I love to go to the casino!! I have no money to do it, but I love to play the video slots. I really just like the bonus rounds, and I prefer the penny slots!
8. Work?!?! I'm ready to move on. And contrary to what people think, hairdressers aren't stupid!! At least this one thinks she isn't!
9. Love, love, love my husband. Ok, corny I know, but he's the bestest thing ever!
10. For fear of sounding really stupid.....here goes...I still sleep with my "blankie". Really it's an adult kind of blanket, but I put it over my face and eyes when I sleep. This can't be that weird, because I know someone who does the same. Maybe not with a blanket, but with a T-shirt....MARI! Did I just "out" someone?
11. Yes, I'm adding another. This is deep, watch out....I'm diabetic. And in so many ways kinda grateful because of it.
Now for the six people:
1. Tony...where for art thou Tony! Because he's fueled my passion, and an unbelievable mtn. biker and friend!
2. Mike...because he was the first to comment on my Tu Diabetes profile, and just sounds like a great guy!
3. Mari...because she's just the inspiration for all!! I know she doesn't have a traditional blog, but has a Tu Diabetes site.
I wish I could tag non-bloggers. I'd love that, but those aren't the rules, and those people above are who I know that blog. That means I have no 4,5, and 6...so anyone out there with a blog and is diabetic, follow the rules and let me know so I can read!
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