World Diabetes Day

I've tried to decide what I would do on this day. I could do the obvious and wear blue, but that just isn't enough is it? Besides...would anyone really know what wearing blue means? It's not like pink...everyone knows what a pink ribbon means. So here I am trying to think of something profound to do, and then I realize that I'm already doing things for the cause. Diabetes Training Camp, Team WILD (former DiabetesSisters Triathlon Team), Type 1 Rider....not to mention every time someone sees my pump and asks about what it is I educate them.
World Diabetes Day is about awareness, so today I will wear my blue and show off my pump, and maybe just to add some impact I will show all the poke marks on my fingers and poke marks where my infusion sets were. Too much?? Actually, do I have anything blue in the closet?

On a not so serious note, check out this blog entry on what not to do on WWD. I laughed out loud! I personally like #8. Thanks to Kerri at six until me for finding it!

There's That Ode to Joy Again

No talk about pumps today...although I do have the Animas Ping now. Updates on that to come:)

I received the best gift ever for my birthday back in August...the Swimman!! The time just fly's by having music in the pool. This if actually very funny to me, because I when I run with my iPod I'm trying to do the same thing. But I came to the realization that I need to run without it because you aren't allowed to use headsets during races. You need to dig deep inside for your motivation to keep moving....and that takes practice in training your mind. But having music in the pool has been great and interesting to say the least. Not only do I have my pump attached to me...now I have the Shuffle clipped to my goggles and the headset sticking out of my ears. It sure attracts some questions, and I'm always happy to oblige.

I have very eclectic taste in music, there is no doubt about that. I have a rather mellow mix, for me, on the Shuffle right now. My swims are all about form right now, and not so much speed, so there is no need for ass kicking, get your heart pumping music. I cleverly put the Ode to Joy and the end for the cool down. The clip below is how I felt during. (Not the beginning, mind you, but near the end. By the way...one of my favorite scenes from this movie!)

Amazing how a piece of music can change you.

Do It!!!

It's The Bomb!

So far, Omnipod is great! I've had tape issues, which I have never had with my Minimed infusion sets, so that's frustrating. I really had to tape it up!! Too much tape for my liking, which I'm sure insurance wouldn't cover. I did have a lot of water and sweat going on.....I swam for an hour or so on Wednesday, ran for an hour on Thursday, 1.5 hrs. of spinning this morning plus 4 showers. Not insane for my life, but maybe that's just insane for the Pod. Again, I've never had issues before with all the activity...just a different product. I used a heavy duty adhesive on my second Pod this morning, so we'll see how that goes. I'm keeping an open mind....there are pros and cons with any pump of choice. It's just how much certain things will bother you. I don't think the tape is a deal breaker...for now. I do have to say this whole tubeless thing was appealing and was a big draw for me, but not necessary because the long tubing really didn't bother me.....but now...now I'm beginning to wonder where this has been all my diabetic life!:) Pretty cool stuff!

I have decided they...meaning the pump manufacturers...need to custom make pumps! Wouldn't it be great if you could add on what features you want...i.e....size, color, functions, waterproof, infusion sets, continuous monitor...etc. Al la carte if you will....AND have it be totally covered my insurance. For that matter...can it be my phone and iPod too???? That's the world I want to live in!

Mums the Word

Yep...that's what I did. "How are things going?", he says. I say, as soon as he walks in...." You know what? I don't want to know what the download of my meter looks like...I don't want to know my A1C. And I actually don't want to talk about any of it, and you are lucky I didn't cancel my appointment!!" He laughed out loud for like 5 minutes on that one, and then realized I was somewhat serious about what I just threw out at him. So now Doc and I are both in uncharted waters. He's never seen me like this, and I have NEVER been like this since my diagnosis....or for that matter ever. I then proceeded to ask him all about his life because I feel he's more like a friend then a doctor, and I'm scheming to try and change the subject. I think he actually "gets" me, and saw right through this. Any good Doc would right? He and I both know that this will pass....he even assured me that everyone gets in this rut. Comforting? Not so much for me....I'm much too hard on myself to let that comfort me! Come on now!

So I've figured a few things out in all of this. I was SO incredibly disciplined at the beginning! Then for years after, it was more of the same. All good right? Wrong....I didn't practice what I preach to all the newbies that ask me questions. When you are incredibly meticulous about managing diabetes, and you don't take a "holiday", you will burn out. And when you fall of the wagon, you don't just fall off...you get thrown off!!! This is where I think I'm at now....off the wagon, and have been for awhile. (How did I get through that Half IM???) A major derailment, but the tracks are in sight and I'm headed back to them! Enough of this already. No more pity parties, because no one is coming to them anyway! :0

Now here I am testing out new pumps, with a new attitude. Focus is the goal for the season. I know I have said that before...but I'm going to focus on a lot of different things. So, stay focused and don't get derailed by the small stuff. Stick to the plan. I figure if I type it out, I have to commit to it. Besides...all my friends that read this...you know who you are...will make me accountable for all of it! I'm asking for it now...ooohhhh I better watch it!

Don't Want to Go

Have any of you ever experienced not wanting to go to the doctor? I usually don't care, but this time....this time I don't want to go. Love the Doc, just hate what the blood work will show! Yes, I already know, and I'm still going. I'm so anal that I won't cancel. This is probably a good thing, I really do recognize that! They will weigh me...yikes...they will do an A1C...double yikes! The only good thing about tomorrow is they will sign my pump demo forms....for that, I'm happy to go.

Ok then.....until tomorrow.

Shopping Update

So...pump shopping is painfully time consuming! When you buy your first one, deciding isn't hard because your Doc usually suggests one. Mine did. I really didn't know much about Minimed when I went with the 512 model. I knew that they were the biggest and the best at the time, so I just went for it. Waterproofness wasn't a priority at the time, and the features on the Paradigm 512 were just fine for me. Now I know more about the technology and what I really need and want in a pump. Not that they make it yet, but what features best fit my lifestyle....waterproof!!!

A pump, is a pump, is a pump, in my eyes. They all do the same thing. They infuse insulin as much like a pancreas as they can. The only difference would be the features they all have. Food lists, insulin on board, infusion sets, size, easy display...the list can go on. Waterproof is my high priority this time around. There are only 3 models out there saying they are.

The Cozmo pump was the first demo. I went for a swim with it on the first day and was elated at my blood sugars during and after!! Having insulin while swimming is going to be a big plus. I got to the shower after and the screen was filled with water and fog. I seemed to be working still, but I knew it would conk out soon....which it did...FAILURE!!!! I was pretty disappointed and called the rep as soon as I could. She told me that the pump demo's are pretty banged up and that she wasn't surprised. To which I said..."So, everytime I drop it, it may fail in the water?".....to which she says...."It might. But we will replace it overnight at no charge." That's great, but I'm pretty sure mine will get beat up, and don't want to have the inconvenience of getting a new one....probably more then once! She was great and met up with me to give me another. I didn't swim with it because I didn't want to ruin another one. I really did feel bad about that. The other features on it were great. I played around with the "extras", but really felt that I didn't need them. Although I really liked having the Cozmonitor (glucose meter) attached to the pump. No need to worry about carrying my meter with me. I just had to carry the strips. But now the kicker....with the Cozmonitor attached it made the unit very big for me!!! The only clip it has is a case with a clip on it, which makes it even bigger. I'm sure for men this is not a big deal, but to wear this on my hip it sticks out like crazy! I still say it's in the running, but I have my questions about it.

The next trial will be the Omnipod. I'm going to meet up with the rep on Tuesday. I'm skeptical about the size and bulkiness, but really want to give this one a shot. And then after that one...I'm set to meet the rep from Animas to try out the Ping! This one is very promising. They are integrating with Dexcom, which I don't like, but I like the Ping technology!










Ok, that's the update. More to come....

Tomorrow is the Day

Oh my gosh.....this scene is how I feel right now....pump trial starts tomorrow..10AM sharp. I'll say it again...hope I love it and it meets all my expectations!

Inspiration

The 2008 Triabetes team finished the Wisconsin Ironman back in September. Here is a preview of the documentary that Andiamo Productions is filming. Brings me to tears.
My DiabetesSisters Triathlon team will do the same in 2009!!!!!


Diabetes and Athletes: The Triabetes Project from Andiamo Productions on Vimeo.

Frustrations

Why is it that things I want to get done go at a snails pace? Obviously people don't want to "work" to sell me anything. In this economy, no less! I'm not sure if it's the doctors office, or the actual pump company. Either way....my pump is dying...and I want a new one soon!
So how do I actually know if its dying...well here are the 5 stages of death...not to be morbid or anything, just amusing I thought.

1. Denial-Yes, my pump and I are both past this stage. The buttons really don't work well. I did think they would miraculously start working better...HA! I waited it out, thinking it would happen.
2. Anger-I'm past being pissed about it.(Accept for trying to get the new one)
   
3. Bargaining- "If you keep up the good work, I promise never to drop you again!"
   
4. Depression-Yep..went through this....really didn't want to shop, and deal with my insurance company and whatever pump company I choose. I hate red tape!
5. Acceptance-Pretty much there....

So...the wait continues....

Pump Shopping

It's finally dying. The pump I've had for 5+ years is dying a slow death. The buttons are not working too well, so before it completely goes, I have decided to start the process of getting a new one. The process is long and painful for an impatient person. In order to just demo one, I have to get a prescription for a "trial" from my doc. He usually gets back to me in a timely manner, but no peeps out of him yet. I'd love to get this demo going this week. The demo is with Cozmo. Tony, my fellow Type1Rider teammate, has been loving his. Lots of great features on it. My interest is that it's waterproof!!! No more disconnecting for the swim!! All the Levimir trial and error was great, and worked well....but for all training and racing this coming year, a waterproof pump is sounding better and better!!

Soooo, the wait begins. I hate the wait. I hope I like it. If not, I will demo the next one....Omnipod.

Who Are These People???!!

Alright...I don't care who you vote for, but this just isn't right! I think either side of the Presidential ticket would agree.
I was driving up to the Renaissance Festival, which is in the middle of no where, and some yahoo had this on his car. I don't know any other way to take it, but I was like a deer in headlights because I couldn't believe what I was seeing! I hope you see it too and it's not just me. I was so upset that Brent had to talk me down...especially when I had to park next to him when we got there. I couldn't even make eye contact with the jerks...I was afraid I would say something and then, with the "Dueling Banjos" playing, they would get their shotgun out of the back and shoot me. I should have left the license plate number in...but let's just say it was a vanity plate!

Look at the trunk!

Did I Mention Lance?

Yes, Lance was at the 12 Hrs. Of Snowmass. Here are the photos to prove I stalked him all morning! He's still kind of a "you know what", but it was still awesome to see him. And, NO, my head isn't Photoshoped in!

The Latest and Greatest

It's been awhile again! Here is the scoop on my busy life.

I've been to Colorado with Diabetes Training Camp. If any of you have been to Snowmass/Aspen, Colorado, then I don't need to tell you how beautiful it is, or how much I enjoyed my time there. It was an incredible camp this time around, and it was because of a few factors. Dr. Matt is the greatest at what he does, but organization isn't his thing....so he wasn't a part of the organizing for this one. It was just Michelle and I who work like a well oiled machine. I told Matt once that I had this vision of his residence while he is working....he's sitting at the dining room table with papers strung all over the place...the phone ringing and he's trying to find a scrap piece of paper to write on. Then he told me that is exactly what it looks like. Figures! On the other hand, Michelle and I have file folders and everything neatly tucked into sections on our computers. I speak for myself, and I just assume she is the same way! She is just as anal as I am.
Colorado was a much smaller camp then Chicago...by like 16 people! Fewer people to keep track of, AND I didn't have to deal with any of their lodging. That was a bonus for me. Although the staff rooms were a task...multiple rooms, and people moving from room to room. That all worked out in the end though.
Lastly, I've done it before. So I knew what to do differently, and I knew what worked.
Am I doing it again you ask??? Yeah, yeah....ya'll know me too well.

The great group from Colorado!

So, next on the list for updating is my Diabetes Sisters project. I don't think I have mentioned this one yet, but my friend Mari has started up a triathlon team of ALL women with diabetes!! Our goal is a Half IM in 2009. We had talked about it in the past, then she got hooked up with the founder of Diabetes Sisters , and the rest is history....we are now the Diabetes Sisters Triathlon Team. Mari is currently hard a work handing out sponsorship kits at Interbike. She's had tons of great meetings and has been getting boat loads of help from Nicole. (Uber bike coach with DTC!) Boy, does Nicole know people!!! I can't wait to get all the updates from Mari on how it's going, and what gear she's getting us.
Our official training starts in October, and I'm looking forward to a schedule again. I have fallen off the training wagon since Steelhead, and feeling like a slug. I will also be a "coach in training" with the DS. I can't tell you how excited that makes me. My head will explode with knowledge!

Not only will I be racing for the DS...but I cannot forget my Type 1 Rider team!! Tony has made HUGE strides with the team this year and I am so committed to helping him and his organization. I WILL race with his jersey this year, and plan to race more because of it! Read his blog...he is a rock star! I'm riding on his coattails and would to get where he is going!


So now for the official goals of 2009.......
Let's just bullet point them shall we??

1. Go for my ACSM certification. Adding to my CI-CPT (Cooper Institute-Certified Personal Trainer)
2. Get my Spinning Certification. Need to get some experience in group exercise!
3. Find a part-time personal training position to gain more experience.
4. Do one race...yes ONE, with Tony! Maybe mtn., maybe a triathlon relay...hmmmm.
   
5. Better time management. I have so many things going on now and I need to prioritize!
6. More strength training!!!! Not my favorite thing to do and it always has to be a goal.
7. Don't sweat the small stuff.
8. Oh yeah....don't forget that I have a husband and family!

That about covers it. Now that is down on paper, so to speak, it looks pretty daunting doesn't it? It'll get done. It may take until December, but it'll get done!

Now What?

My 2008 racing season has come to an end, and I can't think of a better way then to finish 4th in my age group!! It was only a sprint distance, but I actually "raced" this one..went all out, and left everything I had out on the course. It pays off with that #4 spot.

This race was a bit of an afterthought, and I had somehow forgot that I had promised a friend that I would do it with her. AHHHH, my life. Now I was completely torn...my husband was invited to run the meditation at the Buddhist temple that he belongs to, and I signed up for a race. Promised 2 people. Brent always comes first with me, but Brent always comes up with the short straw too. How is that possible you ask? He has no ego, and not a selfish bone in his body...and says,"I'll be running the service again, you'll be able to come another time." Reason #1001 why I married the guy.

So off to the race I went. Jim and Shannon picked me up early so Shannon and I could do the obligatory pacing and getting nervous before the start. This was her first race of the year and she was pretty relaxed considering. The finish line was her goal. She told me as long as I didn't lap her, then she was fine. She was in the younger age group (argh!!) and started 5 min. before me.

I have to mention that all the woman in my wave are 40 and over...it's foggy...the buoys are pretty far out...and we all have goggles on. Like any of us can see without the fog and goggles to begin with! We all had a good laugh about that.
I decided to start in the front this time. I'm feeling good, and the blood sugars are great, so I'm going to hammer away at this race. Last year I started to gain on the woman ahead of me, and I have had a hard time getting past some of the slower swimmers. Decision made...I'm goin to the front, and no looking back!! Every time I looked up to sight a buoy, I noticed that there were orange swim caps in front of me. Then I started to notice white caps in front of me. I was in blue, and I saw blue on either side of me, but not in front. Now this makes me want to go faster!! ( How many times do I have to say it...I'm not competitive at all!!) By the way...ranked #2 on the swim....which means I was the 2nd woman out of the water in my age group.

Out of the swim to my bike and that damned wetsuit. That love hate relationship is coming to it's ugly head. Anyone ever see Plane, Trains, and Automobiles??? Remember when John Candy gets his sleeves caught in the car seat...need I say more? Except that his arms are my legs, especially ankles. Crap, and I still have to check my blood. 3:38 min. later I'm finally headed out on the bike. I'm now, more then ever, convinced that I need to work on getting those transition times down. I never use to care, and used the diabetes as an excuse for it....but now when I see those are precious minutes. But the sweet legs on the bike are present and accounted for, so I passed the women that could actually get out of their wetsuits in a timely fashion. Rank #4 on the bike! And I even saw Shannon out there!

The runner in me has somehow disappeared since I started racing triathlons. I know that's only due to swimming and cycling before, but I just can't seem to get it together time wise. Average pace per mile was 9:44....but I know I can do 9's. I saw Shannon again on the run, and caught up to her 1 minute back. So, to her success, I didn't lap her!:)

Beautiful day, great friend to race with, and a #4!
Brent had a beautiful day also, and I'm looking forward to being there for him next time!

Fall is around the corner...so now what? Two words...mountain bike. To be continued.....

Steelhead 70.3-2008

I'm not sure how to start with this race report. The beginning obviously...the very beginning of the weekend. Watch out...this is gonna be a long one:)
Brent and I made it through traffic to only hit more traffic. So adjustment #1 is the race talk at 6PM is out and the talk at 7:30PM was in. Part of my plan was to eat an early dinner so I would have no mishaps with the Levemir dose at 8PM. At 5PM, Brent and I joined the early birds for dinner, which my choice was bland...4 eggs scrambled very well, whole wheat toast, and pancakes. Yes...just a few bites...it came with it..really!!!
My friend Cindy...who is a friend of a friend and a client of mine, called and said it was very busy at packet pick up so I should head there right away, so that's what we did. By the looks of all the cars piled up around the entrance, I knew she wasn't kidding. We actually got a parking spot right next to the transition area. How that happened, I don't know. As we were parking, Brent saw a co-worker who was there with her husband who was doing his first Half IM too. Small world!! I really didn't want to chit chat, I just wanted to get to the water to see what it was like.
The picture above is at the beach where packet pick up was. I knew my race number, but I had to double check it before I went over to get my stuff. I showed my USAT card and ID to the woman, and she handed me my bag of goodies. I got my body marked and started listening to the race talk....which by the way had started before 7:30. I didn't mind at all, that just means I can get to the hotel earlier!

I anxiously walked down to the beach to check out the water, and to my pleasure I found it like glass and 74 degrees! Could this really be happening??? All my fears of choppy water are gone! I completely relaxed as soon as my eyes saw Lake Michigan. Now I'm ready...now I'm really ready!

On our walk back to the car to get my bike I saw my friend Matt from my old gym that is there doing his 1st Half IM too. We are a bunch of newbies!!! Matt, Brent and I walked back to our cars together chatting about the race and were we ready..blah, blah, blah. I got my bike and pump and set them up in the transition area..which is huge, but I have a very, very small percentage of it for my stuff. Never enough space at big events!!

At around 7:30PM we got to the hotel to check-in, and it was a sea of cars with bike racks on them. This race was around 2000 participants, so they were staying all over the area. I know our hotel was booked, which is why we got a smoking room...NOT what I had reserved. GAG!!! It smelled awful! Determined I was going with the flow this weekend, I let it slip by.

As soon as we got into our room, I started to put "things" together. Then quickly realized that they already were together and packed right where I needed them because I did it before we left. I set my clothes out, set up the coffee pot and then called my diabetes guru Matt. I just wanted to go over race plans one more time. All is good in my head and I should remember all my contingency plans should something arise.
My blood sugar was 98 at 8:15PM and I took my Levemir dose, then lowered the basal on my pump at 9:15PM with a bg at 88. Part of the plan was to eat before bed to reduce the risk of a low during the night, and I would certainly do that with a number of 88!! That Levemir can catch up with you...as I have learned!
I wasn't surprised when I woke up at 12AM...tossing and turning, mostly from excitement. I checked my sugar and it was at 148...a nice place to be! I fell back asleep and woke up at 4AM to eat my breakfast. Bg..101!! Perfect! So far so good. (all bg stats I'll post at the end!)

I got dressed, woke up Brent, ate, then met Cindy (in yellow) and her parents(Dad was racing too), and one of her friends Kathy(in blue) in the lobby. I wasn't sure where we were going and wanted to follow her there. We parked in the Whirlpool parking lot...huge compound! I think they own Benton Harbor...it's the only thing there!:) There were shuttle taking racers to the transition area which was only a mile away..but we took it! I have to go 70.3 today, I might as well take a lift.

As I'm setting up my area, I feel those butterflies come on again when I overheard someone talking about it being choppy. WHAT? How could that happen overnight? I know anything can happen overnight, but really...how choppy could it get? The gang of us are walking down to the race start gazing out on the roughest Lake Michigan I've ever seen. All of them are wondering why they haven't modified the course to a shorter swim. Cindy is now trying to talk me through the swim..techniques and such. "Everyone is in the same situation as you...yada, yada." This is actually working on me..I feel like it's ok, and I'm going to do what I can to finish. Float, backstroke, breaststroke...dog paddle...whatever it takes. A mile later, we got to the start and waited in a long line for the porta-john. Everyone is talking about the conditions. Then we hear over the speaker that the swim was canceled. Canceled??!! My heart sank. This will never be a true Half IM! Is this a blessing that it was canceled, or could I have really done that swim? I'll never know. And won't get the chance to try. The lifeguards couldn't even launch their kayaks, and wouldn't be able to see if anyone was holding up their arms for help...OR even keep their eye on them with the 4-6ft. swells. Extreme disappointment set in. But I had to get that out of my head....which is hard. I so wanted this!

We all walked back to the transition area for instructions on what would happen next.










The waves were bigger then they look in the photos...I swear! Some people packed up their stuff and left, most people stayed for the duathlon that was to come! A 2 mile run in place of the swim. Which sucked! None of our legs were ready for that! I can't believe they got the course marked and ready within a hour. Amazing really. The run was going to be done in the same waves we were assigned for the swim. Age group. It was pure chaos! 2000+ people packed on this narrow road. Plus that very same road was part of the bike course...which now has to be changed. Did I say chaos??!!

Look at all of us....it goes WAY back!!

And look at me...I can run 2 miles:)

Brent didn't see me get on my bike...so no photos of that. But I had a solid bike..not necessarily fast, but solid and comfortable. Again, that was according to plan. I was pacing myself! I think my average pace was 17.9. It was rolling hills, with a few climbs. Not too bad, but there were some rough roads....oh my ass!:) There was a crash..not by me, but I saw the ambulance and someone in a neck brace. I hear one person crashed into another. Yikes! 4 bike lengths is hard to do.

On to the run.
I was smiling on the first half of my run.


Everything was according to plan...only if the plan was no swimming...oh crap, I'm suppose to forget about that! I walked through every aid station, which then turned into walking more then running due to the severe calf cramping. Like someone was grabbing onto my muscle and twisting it into a knot. 2 reasons for this...1, electrolytes were off. My E-caps I take for hot weather and such fell out of my back pocket...I had them on the bike, and now they were gone. The water with Nuun in it (Nuun is electrolyte stuff with no sugar in it) had splashed out of my Aerodrink system because it's a piece of crap. ANOTHER yellow mesh top has fallen out due to a bump in the road. That is the 3rd one, and I'm NOT getting another. I'm going to get another bottle cage before I use that again!!!
2...I was under trained. I knew that going in, but the cramps were unexpected! I figured fatigue, but not cramps that make the legs stop moving.

Now I really have to go with the flow. I had about 4 miles left when this all started, and was reduced to walking for 3 minutes, then running until I cramped up. It wasn't ideal, but worked. And beleive it or not, I was not upset about it. I expected something to happen at some point in the race. I'm just happy it didn't happen until the end. Notice I'm not including the swim here..trying to let go.

After 4 miles of walk/running I made it to the finish chute that is completely lined with people cheering. I'm running, more like shuffling at this point, and then the calf goes again. The uncontrollable urge to stop!!! In the finish chute no less. I am NOT walking into the finish. NO WAY!!! I bent over to rub out my calf and a few spectators were screaming " you can do it"..."don't stop, you are there!" kind of stuff. With a huge smile and a bit of laughter I say.." I'm not going to walk that finish...I want to run" and continued to massage the calf.





























I thought it was gone until I was about 100yds. away from the line...but did not let the urge take over....and finished running!
AHHHHH...sweet relief. I went straight into the tent where there were people helping racers stretch. They massaged my calf and off I went to find Brent...who actually saw me finish!! YAHOO!

Here are the details of the diabetes part starting the night before:
5:14PM-88..eat dinner 50cb.-bolus 4.9
7:37PM-98..beautiful!
8:15PM-6 units Levemir
9:15PM-88-lower basal-eat granola bar
12AM-148
4AM-101-eat breakfast 44cb.-bolus 3.6
5:30AM-239
6AM-242-bolus .3
7:30AM-NO SWIM...tested in transition, 175. Pump back on with normal basal
8:30AM-after 2 mile run-307?? WOW. Causes are no swimming, and basal hasn't caught up yet.
START BIKE:
9:11AM-256 at 10 miles
10AM-131-gel and lower basal
10:43-155-gel
START RUN:
11:48AM-93-gel and lower basal
12:18PM-143
1PM-121-gel
2:08-250-.4 units...this is where I'm trying to get rid of the cramping with gel/Gatorade and not bolusing enough...should have square waved! I wonder where my Endurolytes are??? Somewhere on the course in a Ziploc bag!
3:07-276 after race...but not immediately after
I'm happy with the numbers considering all the factors. I think the diabetes part was a success.

There was good, bad and ugly in this race. The ugly was the cramping at the finish. I've told everyone it wouldn't be a pretty finish, but a finish.

The bad was the swim, or lack there of! I don't think I can get over that fact any time soon. I feel cheated, and I feel like I'm lying when I say I did a Half Ironman. It feels like I did a really long brick workout. It's been 30 hours or so since I completed it, and I still feel...pissed. Nothing more eloquent to say there.

Lots of good really. I felt good with the endurance, so my training was good. Not great but good. I admit I needed more. I had people supporting me throughout my training, AND on race day. I can't tell you how many people sent emails and text messages with words of encouragement. But it's not over! I'm going for it again in 2009. I will finish that whole damn thing, I guarantee it!

Can you say.....

.....butterflies????? Hope I have everything packed! Ready or not, here I come!

It Has Arrived

I like to call it nervous anticipation. Not really nervous, but excited, but not really....I must get my head screwed on straight before Saturday!
I'm almost there. Getting lots of sleep and organizing my gear already...boy there's a lot of gear! Triathletes are gear junkies...just love the stuff!

I got a good run in this morning, and I'm going to do one last Levemir test tomorrow..then rest on Friday. I can't beleive race day is here!!!

Swim Test #5...

...I think it's the 5th one. The blood sugars are really tightening up with this! My strategy this time was to not have those lows the night before, AND to cut back on the breakfast bolus to prevent the drop after my swim the last time. (I didn't post that one, I should do that!) The nightime bg's haven't been in the 40's kind of low, but 60-70's kind, and I don't want to wake up and race after that! For those of you who don't know this interesting tid bit....lows come in 2's, so the last thing I need is another low before, or during the swim.

Here's a little background on the details I'm going to give next. I was suppose to get up at 5AM to eat, and the alarm went in one ear and out the other. Maybe I was in the middle of a very good dream! By the time I actually heard NPR talking, it was 5:30. I jumped out of bed like I was late for a test, and fix my breakfast. Luckily my race day breakfast I can't cook, because I'll have no kitchen. That makes it easy! This late start means something...trust me, you'll see.

9PM-bg 87..6 units Levemir...25 carbs, so I don't go low during the night.
2:45AM-146
5:40AM-129...47 carbs...3.2 units Humalog...less of a bolus then last time
8AM-244...yep not enough bolus:(
8:45AM-249...not sure 'bout that! Swim start.
9:05-200
9:20-170
9:30-145..swim end.
9:45-hook back to pump
10:15-149
11:10-221....ok that one is curious...I didn't eat anything!

Matt and I have some ideas on what happened.
1. Late start with the swim. The low dose of Levemir may only have an action time of 10 hours. Which I clearly hit during the swim. We think that may be the cause of the high after my swim, since you won't see the effects of lost basal until then.
2. Change my bolus ratio a bit for breakfast to prevent the high.
3. By the looks of the drop during the swim, Matt believes that the basal dose is still circulating. It may have been on it's way out, but still there for the time I needed it.

Solution? Don't wake up late when you are testing something new!:) Going to try one more before race day! I'll make sure I set the alarm to wake the whole house up!

A Sign From The Universe

Do I take it as a hint, or what? My scheduled long brick was quickly abbreviated by rain...and a lot of it!! But not before my friend Dana and I got a good hour in. She teaches spin class at the gym I use to belong to and needed to have the legs, and time to get there, so she was only going to half my distance. Any company on a ride is welcome no matter how long they can be with you! Plan A was to do an "out & back" with her for 25 miles, then I would do it again by myself. Then Plan B was implemented when I realized that I would have to do that monster of a hill twice. Hadley Hill, which we have all grown to have a love/hate relationship with. Yes, I do beleive in hill repeats, but there is a time and place for them, and this ride was not one of those times. The route was hilly enough without adding the monster in.

Since I was expecting to be back at my car, I didn't have my phone, but I did have enough gel, water, and emergency sugar. I felt confident that I was good to go, so Dana and I went our separate ways. At this point it is very cloudy still, very humid, and no rain was on the radar when we left. I figured I was good with the weather too.....until I rode 5 miles into my solo journey. In the words of Emeril..BAM! It really only started out as a sprinkle, which I can totally handle...then quickly turned into a flat out rain. Now I'm pissed off....is the universe trying to tell me something?? A sign that you won't ever be ready, and just hang it up?? This is really the last day of a good brick before the race, and I can't even get the miles in.

Does anyone have that kind of friend that knows you so well?? My uber friend Dana drove back to find me in the rain!!!! She and I both really don't feel safe riding in the rain...especially "new" rain when the pavement in extra slippery. I had 5 miles to go, and have not hit the monster yet, and she asked me if I wanted a ride back to the car. I thought about it, and really just needed to finish what I could, and determined to do it! I gotta tell you, I had a feeling she would show up, and when I saw her I felt a little relieved...even though I wasn't going be her "Driving Miss Nancy". She always has my back...and I have hers!

Up the monster I went, and a nice flat ride back to the car. I changed out of my soaked clothes, and drove home...trying to come up with a plan to salvage my brick. I made it 36 miles out of the 50 I wanted. But what I really wanted was the actual brick....bike straight to the run. Now my legs have rested which makes it very, very different. That damn Universe!! I'd like to tell it a thing or two!!

When I got home the sun was out.....OF COURSE the sun was out! Why would it keep raining after my bike is all packed up in the car and I'm home??!! ARGHHH...that damn Universe!
I changed into run clothes loaded up my waistpack with water/gel/keys/meter and of course the IPod. 10 miles here I come. Watch out Universe, you are not going to stop me now! Great run! The end was tough, but the end always is. My legs were a bit tired throughout, so I did have some effects of the ride...which is good, that is what a brick is all about!!

What is the lesson of the day?? Go with the flow...always have a number of plans in place.....and tell yourself there must be a reason for it all......and best of all you have to laugh. What else can happen right? Thank goodness the bg's were stable and stayed in the 140-170 range. I think the Universe was telling me I needed to run. That's my interpretation and I'm sticking to it!

Swim Success #2!!

Test #2 with the Levemir was another success. I really think I'm getting it dialed in now!
Here's how it all went down:
9:30PM-take 4 units Levemir
10:30PM- lower basal to .1
2:30AM-232...I beleive from a high fat meal late that night. I didn't bolus for the whole correction for fear of a low 3 hours later in the pool.
5:00AM- 183...higher then I would like, but there's that bolus from last night
5:30AM-start swim
6:00AM- 159
6:15AM-129
7:00AM-152...after swim
7:30AM-176...eating breakfast, bolus 3.2u with 10u Symlin
10:00AM-127...not quite that 2 hour window, but good enough!

VERY stable bg's I think. Matt agreed. Next step? I'm going for 5 units. I think I may even try to mimic race day on Monday by eating 2 hours before and then swimming. We'll see....I'm doing a L O N G brick on Sunday. I'm shooting for a 4-5 hour. Bike 50, run 10. Last one before Aug 2. If I'm not tapped out from that, then I'll go for it. Otherwise I'll shoot for Tuesday morning.

The Training Triathlon

I train, I train, I train...and I train during a race. Ahhhh....the sweet smell of some success! I admit, I've been a little unmotivated in my training, and I will share no details about that because I'm committed to being the "glass is half full"!! But today is a day to share. It started out frustrating, then went to calm, then on to comical, and maybe a little pain stuck in there. Yes, tons of emotions on such a beautiful day. This race I used as a training race. The plan was to not go "all out". I was just trying to get the body moving, and prepare for the Half IM.

Going to bed a 9PM when it's light out is a bit strange. What am I 7 yrs. old again??? I desperately needed to sleep so I could wake up at 4:30AM, yep that's right, 4:30. I had to drive about 1.5 hours to get to the race site. I packed my car the night before, and set out all my clothes...I even set up the coffee pot! Oh, do I need that coffee when it's an early race day. I printed out my map, and off to bed I went.

The morning brought me no surprises...except for being tired still after 7 hrs. of sleep. Which is a lot of sleep for me, so why was I still tired? It's just the 4:30 smell I guess. The body is use to the 5:30 AM smell.
I made some scrambled eggwhites, and had some yogurt with a Zone bar. The breakfast of champions huh? I poured my big mug-0-coffee and got in the car WITH my map. Why is the map an issue? This is where the "frustrating" emotion comes in. Well....I got to where the map told me, and I had printed out the directions to the Waterloo State Park Headquarters...NOT Portage Lake where the race was. Really good thing I like to get to races early, because now I have time to find where I'm going. I grabbed a park map and found my way to the lake. Yes, I was still early.:)

I set up my transition area in my favorite spot on the rack...on the very end where there is space to spread out. What can I say...I'm a high maintenance diabetic! I don't want my meters or pump to get knocked around! Luckily there was an area just for the female triathletes...the men had numbered spots.

So now the wait....and more waiting. Everyone is now making the trek down to the water...and I'm still waiting....waiting for the last possible minute to take off the piece of machinery I wear. With my wetsuit halfway on...and the rest of my swim gear...I walked peacefully down to the water. Peaceful is an emotion that I didn't mention earlier...but I was. I had been listening to my IPod all morning tuning everyone out to get to that peaceful place so I could focus. This is probably the only thing that is nice about doing and event by yourself, you don't know anyone, and no one will bother you.

I got to the water and immediately got in to warm up. I was excited to try out my new wetsuit. I recently got a full one for the big race, and was anxious to use it!
This swim was BY FAR the best swim I have ever had during a race! Maybe not time wise...but comfort level wise. Remember I didn't want to go "all out" during this race. So I kept a nice moderate pace, which is slightly slower then race pace. I found I was sighting the buoy's better, and not losing my breath. I wish I could have seen what the HRM was reading...that would have been interesting.

I did the run/walk out of the swim to T1, and this is the comical part. More like..."oh crap...do I laugh or cry" part. After the battle with the removal of the wetsuit, I went through the usual routine that I follow in transition. While putting my racebelt on I notice that my infusion site is becoming loose. It's not sticking well at all, which never has happened to me, during a race or otherwise! I beg anyone that I see for tape....I figure duct tape could hold it until I'm home. No luck and I decide to put the racebelt over it around my waist. That should hold it. It did...for the whole cycling portion! I kept checking....like I could do something about it anyway. Now my mind is going...should I quit if it comes out? Should I just suck it up and go on? Hard to do the right thing during a race because there are so many things going through your mind.

I check on the site in T2...still the same, so I bolus a little for a high bg (posting sugars at the end). Racebelt still holding...and I go on. The run is on rolling hills, dirt roads and ends on a 1.5-2 mile narrow trail run. Unbelievably gorgeous!
About a mile into the run it happens...site is gone, and so is the insulin!! I wonder if I could break open the reservoir and drink the insulin..wouldn't that work??!! I continue and try not to think about it too much. But the whole incident took some time away from the run, and now people are passing...probably wondering what the hell that chick is doing. I walked a few hills, and drank water at every aid station, and made it to the trail section. For some reason my pace picked up during that part....maybe I just wanted to get it done so I could go to the medical tent for some diabetic drugs:) None the less, I passed a few who passed me, and then the finish line.
They called my name and he said "you don't even look like you broke a sweat"...sweet talker...I was dripping salt!

I see the paramedics and hope they have what I need...well, because why would I bring extra supplies???!! Usually I do, but not this time. Is that Murphy's Law or what?? Of course they don't have insulin...just regular first aid stuff, and yes, tape. Where were they after my swim?!

Great race, and lessons learned! Here are the stats:

4:30AM-179, 35cb, 3.5u, 10u Symlin
6:20AM-150, turned basal up to .50 for 2 hours
7:05AM- 140
7:30 AM-116, 7cb., went with my gut on this, probably didn't need the carbs
After swim-203
After bike-224
Lost site
End of race-297
12PM-249, home, bolus 2u correction, 45cb. bolus 3.3u
Cut my lawn..where did that energy come from?
3:20-73...there's the low I was looking for!

Now I'm going to bed and I'm at 131 after Mexican food and a beer. Nice treat!

Swim Success!!!

These are the simple pleasures in a diabetic triathletes life!
I've been contemplating what to do about the swim for my Half IM. So my diabetes guru, Matt, came up with a solution. Maybe not a solution, but another trial and error to try out!

The problem with long swims using a non-waterproof pump is that you are without insulin for a given length of time. For me, that's around 1-1.5 hours in the pool. I'll say it again...that's just not normal! You can't expect blood sugars to stay in range without some insulin on board. So the solution you ask?? There is a long acting insulin called Levemir, which is new to me since I've been pumping for so long. The idea was to get some insulin on board that will stay on board. I injected 3 units last night around 9PM, then turned my pump WAY down to nothing an hour later. Through the night was perfect.
1AM-119
5AM-woke up, 104
5:30-start swim
5:45-128
6:05-123
6:45-124
Pure perfection! I haven't had number like those during a morning swim...ever I think. Afternoon swims I have, because there is more circulating insulin.
Now it gets funny...after all the a success I get home to a 201. Not quite sure about that one...Matt I'm sure will have answers for me. I bet that Levemir is gone...3 units really is a very small amount.

I'm keeping close tabs on it this morning. Wondering what will happen after breakfast. All and all VERY happy about this!!!

Track Back to June 1

And then there was the "Ode To Joy".

Brent and I went to the symphony to hear our favorite piece...Beethoven's 9th. I've never heard it live before so this was a real treat! Tickets were super expensive so we got the nosebleed seats where the acoustics were less then stellar. But none the less it was Beethoven's 9th and we were happy to be there.

The diabetics nightmare hits.....you know what I'm taking about people....a low, and a good one at that. I'm prepared as usual, but what of the noise I'm going to make getting.....
a. to the sugar
b. getting the sugar..in the form of Skittles.... out of the wrapper
c. eat it without making too much noise
d. did I mention trying to test also??

Ohhhhh, my love of Beethoven...this is all because of the "Ode To Joy"!

A Must Read!

My great friend Tony just put this great post on his blog. It is a must read! My feelings match his. I don't think I need to say more, except that he rocks!


Took the day off from the gig today to get packed and organized for the weekend at the Burn 24 hour. Did a little work in the morning and evening, but pretty much took a leisurely pace at getting everything ready.

Made meals, last minute bike tuning, laying out my clothing, tools, parts, etc.

I have have received a bunch of emails this past week concerning my comments on my personal racing philosophy I mentioned in my May 14th post. Quite a few seemed to suggest, just as the person I was talking to on the 14th, that I didn't sound competitive enough, or able to race with the "big boys" and the elites.

I find those statements laughable and, truthfully, a little annoying. I don't believe that you have the right to question my drive or commitment. You can ask ANYONE who personally knows me or trains with me (Marcy, or POS) and they will tell you that I am a extremely competitive person who cannot stand to lose or fail. I have been accused of being competitive to a fault. I ride, train, and race as hard as I can to be as fast as I can be.

That being said, over the years I have learned to appreciate the finer aspects of racing more than flat out winning. There is certainly SO MUCH more to consider a "victory" that just taking 1st place.

Leaving the diabetes aspect aside, to me the definition of endurance racing is simply overcoming all forms of mental and physical challenges, and continuing on regardless of the obstacle faced. The events I tend to partake in will push a rider to (and past) their own personal limitations, and I thoroughly enjoy that type of test. When passed, it has a sweet reward like NO OTHER I have ever experienced in any other aspect of my life. When failed, it leaves a biting bitterness in my consciousness that haunts me for long time. Sometimes all the way until the next time I am participating in an event that will test me again.

Add the fact that I am indeed a Type 1 diabetic back in to the equation, and I can find many more "victories" as these races. I am forced to basically monitor the energy consumption and muscular fueling process manually. Just being able to say that I did that at an effective enough level that I was able to complete the event is HUGE to me. That is probably my highest level goal at all events. Everything else is just gravy. Finishing 1st or 51st overall is, honestly, of secondary value.

Does this mean I don't strive to win. Hell no! It just makes my greatest and primary competitor (combatant) at any event diabetes itself. In some ways I actually feel that this leads to MORE pressure and drive succeed. Knowing that diabetes can beat me sometimes (like what occurred at Cohutta this year) is just unbearable. I cannot let the disease think, even for just an instant, that it may have the upper hand. Ever.! I need to keep the throttle down, and need to continue t drive my cleated cycling shoe into its throat.

When diabetes sometimes wins and gains a tiny fingernail hold, a little bit of fear and doubt does start to creep in to my head. Diabetes is a tremendously complicated disease. An unbelievably complicated disease that effects so many aspects of your life and body. Can it even be controlled at such a level?

What if the nay sayers and doubters are right with their statements and predictions? "Type 1 diabetics cannot compete in 24 hour solo events"! "You cannot have successful control of your blood glucose levels under race conditions for that long"! "You will have a catastrophic low and fall in a coma! You will have a catastrophic high, and do permanent damage to your liver, your eyes, your heart"!

I have spent literally thousands of hours in the saddle developing techniques that allow me to effectively race as a "non-diabetic". Learning to use and adapt amazing technologies, tools like the Deltec Cozmo Insulin Pump, I am the only Type 1 I have ever heard of racing these distances and endurance events solo.

24 hour solo mountain bike races and the like are perfect little microcosms of living with diabetes: Learn and train as much as you can. Have a plan for maintaining steady forward progress, but, yet, be ready to deviate from that plan if necessary. Be flexible for an ever changing course in ever changing conditions.

Its exactly what life is like as a Type 1 or Type 2.

To those who emailed to say I "don't sound competitive enough" I say your are completely wrong and misguided. I compete to break the limitations and stereotypes of a deadly disease each and every single time I push down on a pedal whether inside on a spin bike, or during a rain storm during hour 21 at an all day mountain bike race. I compete against myself at least 10 times a day with every blood sugar check, and measure my results one A1C number at a time. A very large percentage of the time, I am completely victorious.

I CAN"T WAIT until noon tomorrow, and the start of the 24 Hours of Burn!!

Just one more......

Sleeping In Feels So Good

Ooooh, and it does! I'm a morning person, so sleeping in for me is 6:30-7, and this week I've had a chance to do a lot of it. I've had a rather slow week at work so that let's my training come in during later morning hours. I have been really liking getting up to eat breakfast, then 2 hours later I can get a good workout in. There is something to be said about fueling up before a long run! I usually just throw myself out the door in the morning, and maybe eat a Balance Bar. This is new for me, and I like it. My run yesterday was great! I mean awesome great!

The sun was out, it was 65ish degrees, NO tights....but shorts and a t-shirt on! This was already setting up to be a wonderful run. My blood sugar was 160ish after 10gms., I had my Ipod on, and my water bottle holder that carries Powergels, Skiddles, and...as always, my meter.....I walk out and start the planned 1:20min. run.
I have a few markers on my route that are my bg check stops. The BIG tree is one, and I stretch there too. It is at about 2.5 miles. Blood sugar is staying even at 165, but I knew I had some insulin on board still and that worried me a bit, so I took in half of a gel. Legs felt good...no aches or pains...OR tight calves, which seems to be a consistent problem for me when I increase my mileage.
Next stop...top of BIG hill. Yeah, an excuse right? But it really is a legitimate stop! I realize I have a problem now...that gel I only ate half of is now all over my hands, which means if I test with all that sugar on them it will give me a VERY high, and very inaccurate number. So I'm now on the search for a sprinkler on someones lawn. How's that for creative thinking? Thank goodness I found one on the next block and another check has me at 142. Glad I ate that gel...which helps more then just the blood sugar, but keeps you from bonking. If I'm going for 1:20min., and it's going this well, there is no way I want to bonk!
I'm trying not to be too surprised at how I am feeling, and focus on enjoying the moment. I have about 20 min. left to go and I changed up the music and went for it. I got home and my final time was 1:15:36. Now normally I would go back out to get the last 5 min. in....we all know I'm anal like that... but I had a feeling my mileage was around 8, and didn't want to increase that until next week. (Very slow increases in mileage=NO injuries) Blood sugar ended in the same range as when I started. Who could ask for anything more?! Thanks to MapMyRun, it was 8 miles. Good guess on my part.

Just one question....Now what happens when I go back to a regular work load and can't sleep in?

Weekend Continued

Ride, walk, eat, walk, grocery store, run 4.5 miles....now what?? Geezzz, where do I find the time?

So I met up with Steve again for a nice recovery ride. I stress recovery here. After 40 miles yesterday, the 20 we did today was welcome. (Can you say "oh my ass" again?) I tried to focus on slow easy climbs, and luckily the area we were riding didn't have many. We finished up early, and Steve decided to go for a short run. I, on the other hand, wanted to run longer this afternoon after breakfast and a rest. Brent and I decided to walk up to breakfast to find that the restaurant was closed. Then walked a block to another one...which was open...thank you. I fueled up and didn't bolus for all of it because of the run I wanted to go on.
I got home and got in the car to Whole Foods. By the way...I HATE grocery shopping. But the alternative is Brent not cooking for me if I don't .....so of course I go.
Home again, and suit up for the long run. Yes, my full intention was to go long...in the 7 mile range. But it got hot here in Michigan! I mean hot and humid! This bod isn't use to that, and the run was a struggle. I even had water with electrolytes in it, but it still was pretty painful. I wasn't so salty at the end of the 4.5 miles, so the water mix must have worked, but it did nothing for the energy.
Ok, it was a long weekend filled with activity, and I could be just tired and haven't recovered enough from all of it....this I know. I guess I'll do a real recovery tomorrow...the pool!

Riding Kind Of Weekend

Yes, yes, yes....let the rides continue! An absolutely gorgeous day, and an absolutely gorgeous ride this morning! I met a bunch of my riding friends at my old stompin grounds. It was a 40 min. drive to get there, but WELL worth the trip. The only awful thing about the morning was the blood sugar of 250 when I woke up. That was way unexpected, and not real sure how that happened...which I will continue to be pissed off about.
I loaded all the gear into the car and headed for Starbucks...I just need that coffee this morning, ok any morning really! I drank and ate my Zone bar on the car ride up. I bolused 2 units, which was half for the food and half for the correction. I, of course, didn't want to drop, and knew the ride would be starting soon, so this was my first bolus guess of the morning. I arrived early...first one there actually...right, a surprise to all of you I'm sure. I layered up a bit more because it freakin cold out! What??? It was suppose to be warmer then the high 30's. I put the leg warmers on, and 3 layers that I hope I can strip off during. (I never did) The 6 of us headed out for a hilly ride. The first 2 headed back after half an hour...they only had an hour to ride. The second 2 turned around after about 12-15 miles. Then there was Steve and I who hammered out 40 miles. Great ride! Nice to be next to Steve again. It was his first ride outside of the season, and he agreed to go for the 40. I figured he would. He paid me a very nice compliment, and said that I was riding stronger then last year. NICE!! That base training is paying off. I ride hard when I'm with him, mostly because I'm trying to keep up. But today....I WAS keeping up, and I wasn't trying so hard to do it. Don't get me wrong, it was still a tough ride, and a challenge, but not so anaerobic.
So the last major hill we hit is very near the end of our ride...and what happens next you ask? Blood sugar 73...and I didn't feel low and wouldn't necessarily at that point, but my legs were feeling a little weak. I really thought it was just miles I was feeling, but no! I downed a bag of Skittles in hopes of getting up that hill. Well...I did, and it wasn't pretty...but I did, with Steve at the top of it waiting to make sure I was ok, and did I need anything. Nothin better then a riding partner who looks out for you. Everyone should have a Steve!
Back to the car....then to Tim Hortons for fuel....home...shower....walk to lunch with Brent...walk home....20 min. nap (who is this girl? she doesn't nap!!)...off to swim with the nieces...and the day isn't complete yet. More to come!

I Got Tagged!

Thanks a ton Courtney! 10 random facts huh? I'll list the rules, because she did, and I don't want to mess this up...although I don't know if I know 6 people who blog....so here are the rules:

The Rules:

Once you’ve been tagged, you have to write a blog with 10 weird, random, facts, habits or goals about yourself. At the end, choose 6 people to be tagged, list their names & why you tagged them. Don’t forget to leave them a comment saying “You’re it!” & to go read your blog. You cannot tag the person that tagged you, so since you’re not allowed to tag me back; let me know when you are done so I can go read YOUR weird/random/odd facts, habits and goals.

Head first..here we go...


1. Maybe this isn't' a weird fact for people who know me well, but I'm a control freak. Not just a little one either, but a big one!!

2. I eat the same thing every morning...yes the same thing. Eggwhite omlette with fake meat, cheese and homemade toast ( the bread is homemade), yogurt(homemade) with blueberries and granola. (homemade) I'm big on homemade!

3. I HATE bananas! Absolutely hate them! If you want to torture me, just eat a banana, and make the gross noise in my ear as your chewing.

4. The first thing I do in the shower is wash my hair. Not very interesting I know, but the rules said weird right?

5. All the clothes I own are black, brown and blue jeans....oh wait I do have a red shirt, and a pair of black pants!

6. I sometimes have the honesty of a child. I'll tell you like it is most of the time. No mystery with me.

7. I love to go to the casino!! I have no money to do it, but I love to play the video slots. I really just like the bonus rounds, and I prefer the penny slots!

8. Work?!?! I'm ready to move on. And contrary to what people think, hairdressers aren't stupid!! At least this one thinks she isn't!

9. Love, love, love my husband. Ok, corny I know, but he's the bestest thing ever!

10. For fear of sounding really stupid.....here goes...I still sleep with my "blankie". Really it's an adult kind of blanket, but I put it over my face and eyes when I sleep. This can't be that weird, because I know someone who does the same. Maybe not with a blanket, but with a T-shirt....MARI! Did I just "out" someone?

11. Yes, I'm adding another. This is deep, watch out....I'm diabetic. And in so many ways kinda grateful because of it.

Now for the six people:

1. Tony...where for art thou Tony! Because he's fueled my passion, and an unbelievable mtn. biker and friend!

2. Mike...because he was the first to comment on my Tu Diabetes profile, and just sounds like a great guy!

3. Mari...because she's just the inspiration for all!! I know she doesn't have a traditional blog, but has a Tu Diabetes site.

I wish I could tag non-bloggers. I'd love that, but those aren't the rules, and those people above are who I know that blog. That means I have no 4,5, and 6...so anyone out there with a blog and is diabetic, follow the rules and let me know so I can read!

Why, Oh Why

Someone answer me...why does a diabetic make homemade ice cream???? This has got to be the most dangerous thing ever!! Brent and I bought a machine last year...with my FULL intention of making the sugar free, fat free version...which I do, but only sometimes. The real stuff is just sooooo good! I limit my serving to a half a cup or so, and hopefully I don't go back for seconds. It's almost summer, and hard to resist.

We all know how I combat all the junk....swimming, cycling, running. The problem is I actually have to swim, cycle and run. With the fear that I won't be ready in August, comes the blowing off of workouts. Yeah, yeah, yeah...I know.....why does that happen you ask? It seems so counterintuitive doesn't' it? You would think the fear would make one work harder wouldn't you? Why doesn't this happen with me?? I just fall off the wagon more.
Someone....please....WHY?

Having said all of that...I look forward to a great ride with my friend Dana tomorrow morning. Weather permitting, it will be her first ride outside since her "incident" last year. The incident being a stroke. I'm really looking forward to it, and doing my anti-raindance all night! This should put things in perspective for me right?

I'm sure I will finish the Half IM in August. I just need to forget about finishing with a good time. My only need is to finish with a good blood sugar, a smile, Brent at the finish line, and hopefully not collapse!

No Cheating the Wind Tuesday

My triathlon bike is lighter then my road bike. For obvious reasons. The whole idea of aerobars is to become more aerodynamic right? Cheat the wind, as they say. But what I realized upon my first ride on the Felt a year ago, is that when in that aero position, if the wind is strong enough, you will fly all over the place. You MUST have some considerable core strength to help keep you in line on the road. Not to toot my own horn or anything, but my core is pretty solid...so much so I can't put an infusion set there because they pop right out. (Nice problem to have though!) Well, this core strength is only one aspect. If you really want to cheat the wind you must have the legs too. And mine weren't alive...again! Where, oh where have they gone?? Riding has been pitaful, and making me nervous about being ready for Aug 2.
But, as always, when the bg's are good, then the awfulness of a ride is somewhat forgotten.
Here it is:
11:00AM-102, 10gm, no bolus
12:11PM-167, start ride
12:48PM-105, Powergel
1:27PM-127, a few Sport Beans
2:15PM-63...oohhh I'm done now.

Could have fueled up and gone more, but was just frustrated and totally bonked out, so I hung it up!

A wise friend...ok, Tony....sent me a text recently:
"u r trying to hard. just forget about the h.r.(heart rate), cadence, etc and enjoy the ride. riding bikes is fun."
Sometimes I forget that. It really is fun! Trust me I will throw that back at him another time!

AHHHH...The Recovery Swim

Nothing like the power of time...it heals all. One day off the saddle and in the pool, and the backside feels fine!

But boy that swim didn't feel like effective training today. It probably was, or will be in the long run. The legs were like 2 bricks trying to stay afloat...the arms were Jello after about 30 min. I have found a love for swimming, but not feeling the love today. Blood sugars were good though. So something is going right. I woke up around 5:30 AM and tested at 73. Of course not horribly low, but enough to want to bring it up for a workout. This is where the brain spins. Do I eat without a bolus? I'm going to disconnect from my pump in 20 min, and not hook back up for over a hour.......oh the dilemma! Food + No Insulin=High BG and a bad swim. Well, I usually just follow by gut, and the gut says eat 10gm, and bolus .3units. Off I go for another trial and error morning. When will this ever be predictable?? It worked great...the gut was right this time. I ended at 121. Must remember this for another day!

If You've Run a Marathon, Watch This!

Sore Ego & Other Parts

Don't read this entry if you don't want to hear about the very real problem a cyclist has...saddle issues....in other words..."Oh my ass!"
I rode today. Yep...my backside feels it! Trying to log miles in the saddle is always hard when you have a real job, and are reduced to riding on the weekends, and the occasional day off. Lack of consistent riding equals a sore behind! And when your butt is sore you're slow...because..well...you're just uncomfortable. Which brings me to the sore ego. When people pass you and give you that polite nod of the head...yeah...that's another way of saying I'm faster then you and you'll never catch me....and by the way what are you doing on that bike...you don't deserve that!
I was able to draft a guy for about 5 min....until he caught on and left me hangin'!
It was windy and a bit chilly today, but no excuses for performance! It was just an off day for sure. But an off day of riding/running is better then not!
Here's how it looked:

I got up and ate the breakfast of champions...not Wheaties....my usual, an egg white omelette, one slice of toast, home made yogurt with blueberries and home made granola..and don't forget the coffee. I'm finding that riding later in the day after a full meal is better for the legs and endurance. Not to mention the temperature!
I headed to the park around 11 AM. After a quick stop to load up on some Powergel's, I arrived to find the parking lot full of cyclists. Very common to see on a Sunday. Even more common on a sunny Sunday! I ate a Zone bar on my way there because my sugar was a great 93, but wanted to raise that a bit for the ride. One last check of the bg at 11:30 and I was at 180. This is optimal for me at the beginning of a ride....AND I chose to eat a Zone bar for the protein content...less of a spike at the beginning and I thought it would hold my blood sugars longer.
12:11PM-165
12:48PM-93
Consumed a GU-27gm
1:31PM-112
Out for a short run
End at 2:06PM-96

Pretty perfect I'd say. If I were to have gone any longer I would have taken another GU.

So, as my ass recovers from yet another bumpy ride, I'll go for a long swim tomorrow.

Thoughts of the Past Few Days

#1
Lows......why do the come at the most inopportune times?
Like when you have to go to the dentist, and the teeth are all brushed, then you have to eat or drink something in the car before you put the money in the parking meter and have to get your crown put on? Or when you are in the middle of working with a client and everything gets fuzzy, you aren't hearing a word they are saying, and you hope that you aren't screwing up their hair. I have another great one...but I'll keep that one to myself. Let's just say I'm glad I have an understanding husband.
#2
There is a reason I ride alone sometimes. To stay focused on my paticular workout of the day is one...but an even better one is because I want to be in my own head for awhile. Another inopportune time. Why is it when you are in this mode that a perfectly nice woman rides up next to you and proceeds to be a Chatty Cathy Doll?? Really..perfectly nice....but I was not in the mood.
The ride was great though! Not ideal bg's' at the beginning, but here's how it looked:
Took in 10gms and lowered basal rate
11:50AM-325....not sure if I should have gone with this number, but rode anyway
12:32PM-308...encouraged a little that it went down
1:08PM-177...Powergel 27cb.+.5 units...don't know why, just a gut feeling
1:48PM-158..looking good
2:05PM-70...good thing I was done.

Maybe that .5 unit bolus wasn't needed...but hey, trial and error right?

#3
I have been surrounded by new diabetics lately. Unbelievable numbers of them. Most of them Type 2, and one of them has pancreatic cancer. That one gets to me. For obvious reasons. Things in this mans life couldn't be more perfect. Works is going great, kids are great, wife is wonderful. Then...BAM! Healthy person gets pancreatic cancer AND diabetes. Now he going through cancer treatment while trying to learn how to deal with multiple daily injections....not to mention just learn about the disease. I can't even begin to imagine what must be going through this mans head.
I sometimes think I have it hard with this disease, but then this is a huge reality check. Why does someones else's hardship give you a reality check???

Update:

After a great dinner with friends, with a little wine and a huge helping of carbs....PLUS a small dessert...my sugars were stable at 130. Then the bottom dropped out as I was going to bed....58....45....I drank 2 juice boxes and a granola bar. I kept checking every 10 minutes or so and it wasn't going up or down...just sitting there in that uncomfortable range. Not a bad low...I've had way worse! This morning I half expected to be high, but lucky me I'm at 82.

That workout yesterday really caught up with me. I must remember to lower my basal after such a day!!! It's never really been an issue before, but 2 plus hours of a high, not really "easy", aerobic heart rate will do it to ya!

Another Brick Under the Belt

"What time are you getting up", he says. "I dunno", I say.
I just love that early morning ride, but when you are going alone, it's hard to not hit the snooze button. So that's what I did...but only once. I'm sure to Brent's surprise...but he had to get up early too.
My goal for today was to do a long brick workout. The best thing for that is to be properly fueled and hydrated. I stretched out the morning eating a good breakfast with the obligatory coffee. Yes, I drank water too!
I got all the gear loaded into the car to headed to the park. I really do miss walking out my door, onto my pony, and meeting friends at the corner. The area I live now is pretty congested with traffic, and I just don't feel safe riding the roads as a single rider.
It's now been about 2 hours since breakfast. I purposefully drove my sugars high, 202, for the workout. I ate about 10 gms of carbs on the road...a just in case measure. I got to the park a half hour later and the bg was 213. Good thing I listened to my gut and did that just in case eating!
I got on the trusty steed...the Felt today. Wow..it's been awhile since I was in that aero position. On the road I mean. I've been aero plenty of times on the trainer lately, but on the road there's the balance issue. Getting into the groove never seems to take too long, and with the stunning day ahead of me it's hard not to let that adrenaline catch up with me.

Here's how it looked today:
10:40am-213 at the start
11:15am-167
11:53am-90- swallowed an icky tasting gel, 25gm(don't get raspberry flavored GU!)
12:30pm-101- drank 15gm Accelerade(new one with some protein in it..not bad)
Commence running.....ok, after putting the bike in the car, and a small rest
1:11pm-after 3 miles 111...isn't that weird? Maybe I should play the Lotto!

I stopped my the bagel joint on my way home for a whole wheat bagel with peanut butter....UMMMMM good. I never eat bagels..too carby. But I love an excuse to eat the stuff I can't...have to replace those glycogen stores!

Pain & Anguish=Control?

Do any diabetics out there wonder this too? I certainly can't be the only one who hasn't felt this from time to time. Why do I even bother with trying to control things? Yes of course I know why, but really....it seems like when I'm not striving to keep things under control vs. working diligently at it, it makes no difference at all. I realize this is all just a phase for me right now, but none the less frustrating. I just want to toss that meter into the trash, and and eat normal, exercise normal, think about food normal, drink normal, dress normal (so I don't have to hide my pump), and...well....just be an ordinary citizen. But then that's just crazy talk, isn't it? Come back from "La La Land", kick yourself, and practice what you preach. Which I never do. But I'm going to try to swallow my own medicine.
Of course it takes all of one second for it to become clear to me.....all this anguish, and yes, a little pain equals control. Maybe not a lot of control at times, but enough. It's hard. Very hard. Very, very hard. But I plan on being around for some time and I'm not going to blow it because of a crappy attitude that makes me slack off. With a disease that constantly throws you curve balls you have to stay smart...there is no room for slacking off. At least in my world. There are plenty of people who do on a regular basis, (I'm sure I don't know any of them), but I don't. Which is where the anguish comes in. I can really drive myself crazy! It's what I do best!

The Long Cold Winter Finally Comes To An End

Finally the day is here...I never thought it would come...but it looks as if spring is here to stay. After many, many months of snow, no sun, and frigid temperatures I felt the sun on my face and sweat dripping off of it today, as I rode for 2 hours in 55-60 degree sunshine. Ohhhhh how sweet it is! If I could just look past the lack of fitness. I really can't stand it. I trained so hard this winter indoors, but it doesn't compare to being outside. I had no legs to speak of, but I enjoyed every hill climb.....while cursing them...and every flat. Only rode about 30 some miles...pitifully slow for 2 hours. I have to believe that it all will come back at some point...just hope it gets here by August!

My blood sugars were pretty good throughout, considering some of those anaerobic hill climbs. And boy, there are some climbs. I started on the loop that had the most, if not all of them. "Let's hit it hard", I say to myself. Then after that loop...."Who do you think you are??? Big George???" 45 minutes have past, and I'm at the car, and I'm not going to wimp out now. I still have energy for more. I made the executive decision not to do the same. The burn in the legs is still there. I made my way to the path instead of the road...it seemed to have fewer climbs, and less steep. I got to the tunnel that goes to the park across the road and headed out for another 8 miles. I took in half a gel around that time....I really didn't want to bonk. I made it back to the car and tested the bg...127. That 5 second wait on the meter is killer. The anticipation is sometimes unnerving. I want a good blood sugar after a workout, and if it isn't I wrack my brain trying to figure out how it happened. I loved seeing the 127!

Beautiful day. Beautiful ride. What a way to spend a day off!